I was wearing my uniformly cool, if not frosty expression as I caught a glimpse of the woman who had stationed herself outside of the supermarket's automatic door.

What is it this time? I wondered: Girl Scout cookies? A fundraiser? Or is this just another street person?

Gosh, I was getting so tired of saying yes and no, of having to confront my generosity and my selfishness.

Then, she held a 5 by 7 photo chest high, and said in a soft, but firm and utterly unforgettable voice:

"My daughter needs an operation.”

By that time, my hand was already parrying her approach, sending its "I don't want to hear it” message back, and my legs were scooting me outside of hearing range.

Then, as I gripped the door of my car, it hit me.

What if her daughter really needs an operation? This isn't a clever con, but bedrock truth, what then?

If so, this is the most courageous parent I've ever encountered. What kind of commitment, guts, determination, and steadfast resolve does it take to reveal this to utter strangers; To ask for pennies and dimes and quarters; To beg passersby to spare the life of your baby?

And how much hurt can you take when someone like me, all 6 feet 2 inches of tough guy, himself a parent, dismisses such a plea out of hand, or only

I pray that her daughter receives the care she needs, that she recovers completely, and that her mom, will not have to do this again.

Whenever I get too self-important, too complacent, ungrateful or unthankful, I have to remember the courage and humility of this woman.

Dr. Gary S. Goodman © 2006