Once a coach has successfully established rapport, it is time to begin the process of understanding the client's beliefs. This is the most critical part of the coach/client relationship.

Successful coaching requires the skillful art of understanding how the client's beliefs impact or affect the connection to the environment. Whether the client is a student or a professional in the marketplace, it is imperative that the client's beliefs are both understood and respected.

Beliefs are much bigger than feelings. A good coach must have the ability to separate the two. Without this skill there can be misunderstandings that ultimately have the potential to make the relationship dysfunctional and untrustworthy. Understanding your client's beliefs will also help you to better understand the internal representations they are making about the world around them. Beliefs can be best described as the client's frame of reference stated in a particular context.

A successful coach will be able to assist clients in making distinctions between their present state, the resource state and their desired state. Present state can be identified by understanding how the client is communicating. This technique requires great attention to the communication process between the coach and the client. The coach must use the "mind and body are one” system of communication.

A coach works from the assumption that the mind and body are one cybernetic system; communication is redundant, and the meaning of communication is the response you solicit. The coach must help the client understand interferences or limiting beliefs. In other words, the coach helps the client identify the resources he or she needs to make the changes for a more positive life. The coach does not tell the client how to do that but assists by providing a series of tools to equip the client to make the desired changes.

Interferences can come in a variety of forms. Clients may state either what they do or do not want to change, or they may not be able to express in words the representation that is desired. A successful coach will help clients: 1) know what they want; 2) know if they are getting what they want; and, 3) develop the flexibility to change their behavior until they get what they want. T

he client's outcomes are to provide direction, purpose, and meaning, and should always be stated in the positive.

Coaches must be able to understand how the client's perceptions, emotions, voice, tone, pitch and body gestures impact behavior. They can then assist clients to understand their behavior by understanding behavioral frames.

Here are four important behavioral frames:

1. Distinction between outcomes versus problem - focusing on the solution is much more useful than focusing on the problem because it determines the direction in which the client will focus energy and resources. 2. Distinction between opportunities versus limitation - the coach assists the client in looking for opportunity in every situation rather than looking for what is wrong in every situation. 3. Distinction between failures versus feedback - judging a person limits one's opportunity to provide feedback. Helping the client by giving them feedback provides a vehicle for growth and wisdom. 4. Distinction between "How versus Why” - by asking 'how' questions, the coach can assist the client to set realistic and manageable goals.

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