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Have A Life And Still Be A Great Parent

A big part of becoming a life coach is creating a wonderful life for you. We can't coach our clients on having the life they want if we don't have the life we want. You can't teach what you don't know. I also can't coach parents to be the parents they want to be if I'm not the mother I want to be. It's a role I take very seriously and one I'm proud of. I've made mistakes but I know I've done an excellent job.

What has been one of the main factors in making me the parent I want to be? I learned very early on that if I was happy, so was my family. I remember soon after I had my first child a friend told me about aerobic classes being offered at our local community centre and they had a new childcare facility. I loved the idea of being able to work out, meet new people and have my baby cared for all under the same roof. I ended up going 3 times a week for 13 years! I met lots of moms who had babies the same age. A big group of us became friends and had coffee together after the class before picking up our babies. Our babies grew into toddlers, and then became preschoolers and soon they were all off to school but we continued on.

The exercise relieved stress, kept me in shape, helped me sleep better and the friendships kept me connected to the adult world. Our kids also made friends with each other. Because I had taken the time to take care of myself, I was more patient, less irritable, more fun and better able to let go of things that weren't important. My exercise program now, is regular walking with one o

f my good friends and 3 times a week at "Curves.”

While my kids were small, I read lots of parenting books and other self-help books but seldom read novels. I decided to start a book club as a way to motivate myself to read more novels and create social time with friends that were important to me. That was 5 years ago and our club is still going strong. There are 6 of us who meet monthly taking turns hosting. We all love it and have read some fabulous books that have stimulated some great discussions. We talk about lots of other things as well.

Purposely creating a life of my own, I know has made me a better mom. I have more to give my family; the most important people in my life. My kids deserve a mother who is at peace with herself and pleasant and fun to be around. My husband deserves a wife who has a life of her own and isn't carrying around resentments.


Barbara Desmarais is a parenting and life coach and mother of two teenagers. She delivers workshops on issues related to parenting and coaches parents privately in person and over the phone. She can be reached at barb@theparentingcoach.com Her website is http://www.theparentingcoach.com


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