It's been nine years now since I retired from my full-time career of court reporting. I'd been a reporter for 23 years and was trying to find just the right part-time job for my interests and abilities.

In my search, I had taken a part-time job for a veterinary clinic working in the kennel area because I dearly love animals. After five months, however, this proved to be too strenuous a job for me. I loved caring for the animals, but most of my time was spent cleaning the kennels and bedding, and washing and disinfecting food bowls and floors. On Sundays I was alone all morning sometimes with 25 dogs and 5 cats to care for and not all the animals were friendly and happy to be there. In fact, most of them wanted to go home so badly, the barking never stopped. I'd spend time reading their information sheets aloud and telling them how many "big sleeps” it would be before they got to go home. I was so exhausted from standing on the cement all day, I finally decided to try something else I felt I would be more physically suited to.

I answered ads galore and visited scores of employment agencies, all to no avail. I was confused as to which direction to take next so I attended a drop-in support group for job seekers and listened attentively to each person's story. As it got closer to my turn to speak, I felt my emotions beginning to well up inside me. I was becoming bitter about the whole process of interview/interviewee. I had tried "dressing for success” and felt my left toe going numb in my too-tight heels, the air being squeezed out of my lungs in my fashionable leather belt and my ear lobes stinging with pain from my upscale earrings. My son had commented to me as he saw me going to one more job interview, "Mom, if you don't like wearing those clothes, why do you do it?” I had to admit, I had no good answer for him. "I have to look good for my job interview” was all I could manage to mumble. In the support group, when it came time for me to speak, I almost broke out in tears of frustration. I railed against the 8:00 to 5:00 time card mentality of the companies I had applied to work for. The facilitator ended my monologue with, "Why do you want to work for anybody else? It sounds like you want to work for yourself.”

Ahhhh, the clarity of those words was like putting a piece of duct tape over my mouth. I was suddenly speechless. He had said it all for me.

"What Color Is Your Parachute?” was a book that a job counselor had recommended that I read. She said I was unfocused as to exactly what I wanted in a new career direction. I found a copy of the book at the library and devoured every page and did every exercise hoping to uncover my hidden interests and unknown skills.

Time and again after each exercise I came up with the exact same three passions: art, animals and metaphysics. With one exercise, I was to imagine which group of people I would gravitate toward at any party. I picked the artistic/intuitives. Every magazine that came to my house covered one or all of those subjects, and every bookmark on my computer was from a website that specialized in one of those areas.

Now that I had my most favorite passions in mind, what was I to do with them? Deep in the recesses of my mind, I knew that I loved to draw and paint animals, but how could I turn that into a career? Would anyone want a portrait of their companion animal? What would I charge and how would I begin? I attended a dog show and a dog walking fundraiser and put in my booth a painting of my Australian Shepherds along with samples of other paintings I had completed for friends and family. O

ne by one the orders started to trickle in. I learned how to write html and loaded a page on ebay offering my services as an animal portrait artist. Everywhere I went I used affirmations to bolster my courage and send a message out to the universe. "I am working full-time as an animal portrait artist,” I repeated. "Prosperity flows easily to me as I share my gifts with the world.” Sure enough, orders from my ebay page started to come to me. I was shipping completed portraits all over the country and up into Canada!

Now, as we step into present day, the feedback from my clients is enormously satisfying. I have that fulfilled feeling in my heart that I'd always wanted in my work.

Metaphysics also looms large in my experience of painting portraits. One time recently I was working on a portrait for a friend I met through ebay. The portrait was of a German shepherd that had passed over the Rainbow Bridge. He looked almost exactly like my long-haired German shepherd that had died years ago. This German shepherd was named Wolf and his one ear was relaxed and tipped over just like my shepherd's one ear. The resemblance was uncanny!

As I was attempting to paint Wolf's portrait, I was having so much trouble. I literally worked 2 hours on just the layout and then ended up painting out what I had started and beginning again! This had never happened before. I felt I was having an emotional block because of the resemblance. I said a quick prayer for help and continued on.

I was moving my little magnifying glass over the picture and zeroing in on one of his eyes. Just then, his eye GLEAMED at me, with a light that radiated from the picture! I froze. I felt chills run up and down my spine. It was then that I saw it ~ a tiny, hairline scratch on the photo that was reflecting the light back to me and bringing his eye to life! From then on I realized that I had all the help I needed. I felt his energy with me with each stroke of my brush.

I continue to this day to feel each animal's energy as I paint. I sometimes run my hand back and forth over the photo. I've felt the festive personality of a cocker spaniel, or the quiet pulled-in nature of an aging poodle. When I feel a blockage and I can't seem to get the animal's likeness just right, I say a prayer and hear words of encouragement come to me and I'm guided as to what and how next to apply the paint. My love and devotion to animals and to portray them as the "faces of love” that they truly are has led me in a new direction of happiness, fulfillment and peace.

To all who are searching as I have done: it's all there inside you ~ just reach in, reach out and know that you are loved!!!

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