I am writing this in an overcrowded departure lounge, awaiting a delayed flight to Edinburgh, Scotland. On my left, two consultants are having a conversation. One of them is giving lots of advice. "Does that answer your question?” he now asks. From his companion's face, I would say the question has long been forgotten. The folded arms, shifting eyes and blank look all indicate that this long-suffering human being is silently praying for the flight to be called - or anything that will deliver him from the verbal onslaught he currently endures.

We never get to use our skills until someone trusts us enough to share a problem with us. While others shield themselves behind a wall that says "I'm fine”, there is little space in which to do business. The biggest blocks to doing business are often not our fees, our talents, our message nor our skills, but the fact that not enough people really trust us.

How many people do you trust?

A simple experiment should enable you to verify this for yourself. Choose any aspect of your own business, other than your specialist expertise, such as administration, IT, marketing, sales or recruitment. Now ask yourself "If I were going away for three months, who would I unreservedly trust with this part of my business?” Count the number of people you can name - it probably won't take long!

What gets in the way of trust?

On my left, Mr. Consultant's companion has escaped to the bathroom. The first rule of trust is that we must be able to listen. All sorts of issues get in the way of listening: our needs, our agenda, the need to prove we are right, the desire to prove we can make a contribution. If we didn't have to be right, what a difference that would make!

The second rule of trust is that we must service a need that really exists. If we first have to create the need, we become evangelical. Evangelists might be admired, but are less easily trusted, as they are often viewed as being more attached to their message than their client.

Credibility

Thirdly, specialists are usually perceived to excel, while generalists are often viewed as "j

How we behave

Our actions say much more about us than words ever could. This brings us to the fourth rule of trust - the ability to keep promises. This encompasses our ability to be on time, to return calls, to send information as promised, to work within agreed budgets and to be consistent.

Our motives

We have all met experts who are credible and reliable, yet their motives remain unclear. This brings us to the fifth rule of trust-building. Do our words and actions display self-centred motives? Self-preoccupation ruins many professional relationships. Arrogance, ego, the need to be right, may lead business advisors to rush in with solutions when it would be more appropriate to listen more to the problem.

Simplicity

The sixth rule of trust is about clarity. If we cannot understand the service easily, we respond by asking questions. If the pricing is complex, or the service offering unclear, clients have to ask more and more questions in order to understand. This can create discomfort, which may manifest itself as mistrust.

Finally, we must be able to relate to the client as a person. Being an outstanding expert is not enough anymore; it has to be a pleasure to deal with us, too.

No wonder we don't trust too many people!

(The above article is submitted on the basis that the following attribution is printed with it, using the exact wording below.) © John Niland, November 2005